Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Boozer rhymes with loser

Don't look now, but the Detroit Pistons have won 11 consecutive playoff series in which they've won the first game. Couple that with the fact that teams with a 1-0 lead and home-court advantage in Game 2 of a best-of-7 NBA series have won 222 series while losing just 35, and it looks like we'll be waiting a lot longer than the rest of these playoffs before feeling good about the Cavs again.

So here's a few things to take solace in while waiting for the Cavs to play pavement to the Detroit steamroller:

1) Carlos Boozer will be knocked out of the playoffs even sooner than the Cavs.
-- Yes, it looks like another Pistons-San Antonio Spurs NBA Finals matchups, what with the Spurs dismantling Boozer's Utah Jazz in the first two games of their series. The Spurs won Game 1 by eight and Game 2 by nine, nearly identical results. The Jazz will have to win four out of the next five to advance. San Antonio had only one stretch this season where it lost that many games. The Spurs lost their last three games of the regular season and the first game of the playoffs. But for two of those games, they rested their best players. So don't count on it happening again. Boozer will have to content himself with his big contract, cause he ain't getting a ring.

2) The NBA Draft Lottery ensured the Cavs will remain among the elite of a weak Eastern Conference.
-- Thanks to some bouncy Ping Pong balls, it looks like Ohio State big man Greg Oden will wind up with the Portland Trail Blazers and Texas' Kevin Durant will head to Seattle. That's right, make those Western Conference teams even stronger!

3) No choosing between the Cavs and American Idol.
-- Not that there would be any choice of course, but the NBA will allow you to watch both. Especially if you are a teen-aged girl or pussy-whipped. Game 2 of the Cavs-Pistons series won't be played until Thursday because the NBA did not want to compete with the American Idol finals.

4) Higher draft pick for the Cavs.
-- Oops, maybe not -- they traded their first-round pick away!


Anonymous said...

There might be truth to this if there was a such thing as a god.

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