Monday, April 10, 2006

Welcome to Bizarro Cleveland

Welcome to Bizarro Cleveland, where the Indians are in first, the Cavs are the hottest team in the NBA, and the Browns are considered by many the most improved team in the NFL.

And April Fool's Day is long gone. Perhaps Best Week Ever will be devoting its next episode to Cleveland sports.

Opposite Week continues today with word that ex-Indians outfielder Coco Crisp -- he of the much debated trade to the Boston Red Sox this winter -- will be out up to two months with a broken finger. Of course, Coco was supposed to be out for about two months with a torn ligament in his thumb at one point last season; he missed just two weeks. So if Coco does miss an extended period, and our own C.C. Sabathia returns much sooner than the original three- to five-week diagnosis, has Bizarro Cleveland become real Cleveland?

Already Bob Wickman has more saves than B.J. Ryan and Trevor Hoffman combined, two closers with whom the Indians played footsie in the offseason. Nomar Garciaparra, who the Indians coveted, pulled a Juan Gonzalez and went on the disabled list before the season even started. The supposedly improved World Series champion White Sox just finished losing two of three to the lowly Kansas City Royals. Meanwhile, Lebron James-for-MVP talk is heating up and Penthouse has picked the Indians to beat the Cardinals in the World Series. Soon people will be planning their summer vacations around the chance that the Cavs will be playing in the NBA Finals. And to top it off, it's 65 degrees and sunny today.

Whatever alternate reality we've spun off into, it's not too bad. But be certain that even in a parallel Bizarro Cleveland, God is still pushing the buttons. Or perhaps it's just Bizarro God, bored with the same old same old. If someone shows up to offer you a choice between a red pill or a blue pill, you'll know the jig is up. Until then, enjoy the ride.

1 comment:

My Name Is Strayer said...

yeah, it is insane... the most bizarre is Blake, Boone, and Brousssard doing something besides sucking