Pro Bowl blues

Let Jamir Miller's story be a cautionary tale for those of you clamoring for another Brown to finally make the Pro Bowl. Tonight, the NFL will once again play its Pro Bowl without a Cleveland Brown in attendance. And once again we should be on our knees thanking God for this.

You see, the last time -- in fact, the ONLY time, -- a Brown made a Pro Bowl since their return from the dead was at the end of of the 2001 season. Miller recorded 13 sacks and 81 tackles that year. He also knocked away 12 passes, showing ability up and down the field. Miller was the face of Butch Davis' up-and-coming defense, and a reason to believe there was a reason for the Browns to rejoin the NFL.

So God smote him down.

Yes, Jamir Miller never played another regular-season game in the NFL. In the first quarter of the Browns first exhibition game the following season, Miller tore an Achilles. Thanks to God's wrath, Miller wasn't even able to walk away from the game he excelled at. Despite attempts at rehab, he never recovered enough to take the field again. God chortled when he allowed the Browns to make the playoffs that season, only to lose due to a defensive collapse against arch-rival Pittsburgh. "If only Jamir Miller weren't injured," we all said.

No, no, no, no, no. If only Jamir Miller hadn't made the Pro Bowl! Then God might not have felt the need to punish us for our pride. And since we didn't learn our lesson the first time around, we haven't even been allowed the opportunity to be prideful since. Miller remains the only Browns Pro Bowler since Browns 2.0 started in 1999. And God remains happy.